sweetz.....=)

secretly took a picture of this short passage from one of Ji Mi's book when i was at vivo's PageOne last friday...
just find it very sweet...yet, somewhere in my heart ached...i just wonder why...

some random thoughts...

i am actually amazed by the fact that i still have got time to put up new postings...(given the fact that i have not completed my revision, etc etc...) and i seriously wondered when would i start getting 'gan chiong' over everything...(because the 'gan chiong'-ness just comes and go, as fast as depolarization and repolarization...x.x)
in fact, the days left to As can so easily be counted...just 6 weeks more...and two more months to the end of my As...
being such a 'optimist', i realise i've been worrying and thinking about all the post-exam activities, that i almost neglected the current situation, and also i screwed i am, with my subjects...
so i came up with a solution which i've got no idea if it works, that is to list some of my current thoughts down...hopefully they'll be left here, til i complete my finale battle...(of course, there will be some 'unwritten' stuff which are in my mind...but then again, i shall leave it there...=P )


1) watching 'ratatouille' on tues with melia...=D
2) wanted to watch 'no reservation' & 'the invasion'...(but guess i wont have a chance to do so...=/)
3) 5 more tuition sessions to go...and her mum still owes me the previous pay!! =X)
4) thinking of what hair colour to highlight...(but i think i've made up my mind about it...=) )
5) thinking of my new spects, which have been confined in the spects box for mths...and yet, two mths more, before it can see the daylight...(hopefully it wont rust by then...XP )
6) wanting to get my japanese-english dictionary...
7) thinking of what job to take up after As...
8) thinking what is wrong with my handphone...a little cranky at times...
9) reminding myself to get prepared by the com next thurs night to compete with all those kiasu people in booking the chalet...because i lost to them when i tried booking this friday...
10) thinking if i should drink coffee or tea to keep myself awake in the afternoon...
11) calculating how much unnecessary time i've wasted...
12) and how much left for studying...
13) still mourning over my bag's damages...
14) wondering what courses can/should i take...
15) wondering how am i going to pay for my school fees in future...
16) having second thought on buying a piano...
17) wondering if my application for relief teaching next year would be approved, or not...
18) waiting to watch the drama serial that i saved in my disc drive...
19) thinking of all those birthday presents and how to get them...
20) wondering if i should buy a new bag...
21) wondering if i can finish my revision...
22) wondering if i can attain my target pay...
23) feeling helpless for losing 4 bucks on toto on last friday...
24) finding a song that can suit my current feeling...(but i think '一直很安静' suited me well, to a certain extent though...)
25) watching the complete episoide of 'aishiteruze baby'(again!!XP), 'ichigo mashimaro', 'honey and clover' and 'Saiunkoku Monogatari' after As...all of them are intro-ed by shane, except the last one, which i just happened to came upon and it looks nice...=) )
26) want to complete FF7, 8 and 9...and hope to get/lend a PS to play FFX...
27) thinking if i should get the white VAIO laptop...(this is just a want, not a need though...X/ )
28) wondering if i can stop digging all the questions in my mind out, and at the same time preventing myself for writing things that i dont want to amplify, though it is in my mind for a long long time...



so i stopped...

and shall end with a picture of the deepest impression i have of the 'honey and clover' anime...because i just cant stop laughing at that scene...though i only watched the first episoide...geez...

wanted to ask you today...but i guess you've forgotten about it anyway...

an oasis in the desert...

just want to mention something that happened during my bio paper today...as usual, i didnt manage to finish it...and when the teacher said 'pens down', i did a final check through the papers, and took a look at those pages that i did not attempt...(yep, sad to say, it's pageS and not just one page...) then i saw this question asking for the site where photosynthesis occur...and i was like, 'its MITOCHONDRIA!!' and quickly scribble it down....and happily, i told myself...at least i secured one mark...then when we came out of the hall, i mention about it, and jolene was like, 'isnt it chloroplast?'...then...you can imagine how much i want to bang my head onto the wall right?I ACTUALLY THOUGHT IT WAS MITOCHONDRIA AND DIDNT REALISE IT WAS WRONG!!!wth!!!!i wonder if i ate any pig brains...(but i didnt!!) so...i still lose that one mark despite risking and scribbling it down after time's up....(hey, its like almost the first time i scribble things down after time's up lor!!) haiz...yep...so, just like how miss raj felt when marking our gp essays: met an oasis in the desert... x.x

第一个清晨

第一个清晨 by 王力宏

光投进爱
把梦刷白
舍不得你会醒过来
不要现在
昨夜走太快

说不上来
隐隐藏在胸口一块
吻你脸颊
证明此刻真的存在

是你让我相信爱
对我慷慨
是爱我们是注定不是意外

这是爱
我们的爱
还不确定却好实在
把你贴在胸怀
静静的代替表白
才不愿放开

这是爱
给你的爱
没名字却停不下来
在忐忑里期待
雀跃中想到未来是你我才明白
这就是爱

但梦还在
小心不让你醒过来
也许现在
就是永恒的未来

第一个我们的清晨
迷人和默契都是你的
无限可能
言语都显得太肤浅

today, today, and today =)

oops...if i caused any worries due to my previous posting, my apologies!! XP
sometimes, i just need to vent out whatever that is bottled inside myself...
so that i will feel better...
and perhaps forget whatever that i dont want to keep in mind...=)
and after that...i'll be a happy girl again!!
yeah~~sunshine always comes after the rain...
and hopefully, the rain referred to my prelims and the sunshine would be my As...
hah...(look how much i digressed!!XP)
doubt i'll do well in my prelims...
after my econs and physics paper 3...
just hope that i'm not the only one doing badly for it...=X
tomorrow's maths...but i'm not prepared...
neither did i prepare for it during my sept holidays...
oh well, we'll see how it goes tomorrow yea?
the wicked me still hope that everyone will not do well for all the prelim papers...
so that i will not grief over my results in time to come...
but on other hand...
i just hope that i'll score for As...
prelims isnt really much that matter, other than the guilt from disappointing my teacher...
yep yep yep...so i shall go...

but before that, just wanna post up a song sang by my physics teacher...(to reduce my guilt for not doing well for his paper today...=P)
we filmed this during our physics tut...but for some reasons, the resolution is terrible here...so...just turn up the volume of your speaker and enjoy his voice k? =)



lastly,
for us having prelims & those who just started their SIP,
all the best!!
ganbatte ne!!

ja matte ne!! =)

i wonder....

7th sept
have been feeling sick after meals for these two consecutive days...
yesterday's were so terrible that i feel like vomiting once i stood up...
so i end up studying on my bed...
till i fall asleep at 2 plus...
while i was wondering what was wrong with me...
something just came to my mind...
and i silently asked myself...
what would people do if i were to die tomorrow?

glad that i'm gone?
or try to be sad because somebody just died?
or shed a tear, 'cause i'm not worth anything more than that?
or be sad for a while before they get excited over mahjong?

or would they undergo depression?
or undergo days of sleepless nights?
or would they cry in the middle of a comedy, just because they thought of me?

or learn to treasure more and be more appreciative of the people around them, because they realise they did not treasure me enough when i was around?

it just kept me wondering...
and for some reasons, i feel that i'm so insignificant in people's life...
even though they mean alot to me...
and i hate that kind of feeling...

i remember i learnt something in the skills session...
the lecturer told us three types of people, and it goes something like that:
1 Investor - give, then receive
2 Taker - take but never give
3 Receiver - receive, then give
she said we should always be an investor, and not to think of receiving anything...

but sometimes, an investor can be tired out too...
especially when you're an investor who always give, but never receive...
yet you see people always receiving, when they dont even give as much...
and sad to say, that's reality...
and it sucks, at least for me...

when you go to a place,
and it reminded you of someone whom you'll never get...
would you ever realise that there is this another someone beside you,
would dreamt and hoped that one day she'll attain that level of importance?

while i was sms-ing my friend,
she said: your world does not only revolves around him...
and then i realised,
that i got so concerned over the issue,
that i really thought that my world just revolves around him...
perhaps i am still feeling the same now,
but she made me realise that other than him,
there are still other people around me...
if not, at least i know she is one of them...
but yet all i could see was that problem...
and the person related to the problem...

maybe you'll find my posting too long and tiring to read,
although you're able to patiently read someone else's post even though it might be even longer...
perhaps this is the reality...
that i'll never be able to have the qualities to replace someone else...
despite all the attempts and sacrifices, if there is any...

perhaps...
everyone wants to be remembered...
everyone wants to be loved...
everyone wants to be needed...
everyone wants to be cared...
but only by that particular someone...
and sadly, it'll never be me...

空荡的街景想找个人放感情
做这种决定是寂寞与我为邻

我们的爱情像你路过的风景
一直在进行脚步却从来不会为我而停

给你的爱一直很安静
来交换你偶尔给的关心
明明是三个人的电影
我却始终不能有姓名

你说爱像云要自在飘浮才美丽
我终於相信分手的理由时候很动听

给你的爱一直很安静
来交换你偶尔给的关心
明明是三个人的电影
我却始终不能有姓名

给你的爱一直很安静
我从一开始就下定决心
以为自己要的是曾经
却发现爱一定要有回音

我们的爱情像你路过的风景
一直在进行脚步却从来不会为我而停

给你的爱一直很安静
来交换你偶尔给的关心
明明是三个人的电影
我却始终不能有姓名

给你的爱一直很安静
除了泪在我的脸上任性
原来缘份是用来说明
你突然不爱我这件事情

days passed just like that....

backtracking on a little something in my life recently...

1st sept

i went for my last skills session and try to take home as many 'words of wisdom' as i could...and here's one that i really like and agree alot with...

to be happy with a man,

you must understand him a lot and love him a little...

to be happy with a woman,

you must love her a lot and try not to understand her at all...

another thing to add...my sweet girlfriend, nurul, gave me a packet of oreo...isn't it so sweet of her??*big grins*

aren't you jealous? ;P

vandalism is prohibited on personal property!! X)

and then i recalled that the pocky from joel is still in my cupboard...so i took it out, took a photograph of it and put it back...but hey, dont misunderstood horz...i put it back because i'm gonna save it for my last day of As...=)

31st sept

had teacher's day celebration in the morning and gave cards and chocolate muffins to all those teachers who have taught me...and also my dear principal...
after that, i popped by my secondary school to look for my two bestest teachers there...but only manage to see my maths teacher because he came out to look for me...(oh well, i was stuck outside gate as usual...because the security guard only allows us to enter after the concert has ended...but it has just started when i went...-_-")

really felt the sense of satisfaction and i'm rather glad that i 'thanked' my jc teachers...even though they only taught me for less than 2 years...because i'll rather put in the effort and thank them properly, than to give it a miss and regret after that...

when my sister asked why i gave my principal...and i told her, because he is the greatest educator among all...our teachers taught us things that we need to know for our exams...but he taught me things that i can apply throughout my life...how wonderful it is to have a inspiring principal...=)

one of my schoolmate msned me and gave me a little shock...even though i knew it coming...erm, but that is all i'm going to mention here...

30th sept
had my GP papers today...as usual, i'm not confident for both papers...especially my paper 2, where i am left with one last concluding sentence for my AQ question...hopefully i can scrape through...*worried*

28th sept
a pretty nice day for me i would say? =)

went to my friend's house with a failed attempt to study XP...and then went for a movie after that...

but it is also the first time i watched movie alone...oh well, not really alone...but it felt very close to that...=(

though i enjoyed the show, but i just dread the feeling of being alone i guess...especially when i couldnt find a shoulder to lie on when i need it...

this is on the 25th aug... and this?26th...
although i reduced from three cups of coffee to two cups, and two cups to one, i still got a feeling that i'll turn into some styrofoam thingy in my next life...hahs...=X

well...when you asked me to tell you something emo when you're feeling emo, i couldnt find something to say...but perhaps now i know what to say...*if there is still a 'next time'...=)